So, today is the 24th July. This day means different things to different people. To a lot of you, today is just another day. One more day to get through until you get to those days that are important to you. Today, however, means a lot to me. Not only is it my birthday (and my 21st), it’s also the 2 year anniversary of when my little brother died. Therefore, it seems fitting to write something in remembrance of him. (I’ll be celebrating my birthday next week, so in regards to that, today is just another day).
The photo, used as a header for this post, was taken whilst I was in France in June. It’s the beach in Messanges where Kieran died. Whilst we were in France (Mum, Dad, Alex, my older brother, his fiancee, my nan, and I) we went back to Messanges, to the place where it all happened. Whilst Mum, Dad and I were revisiting, it was the first time for the others and it helped them to understand where it was that it happened. To most people, it’s just a beach (and a rather lovely one at that), but to us, it means something different. It’s the place where my brother died, and although I miss him every day, I find peace in knowing that he died splashing around in the sea, doing something he loved.
Today, Mum and I both have days off work. We’re going to visit Conkers (yes, the same place where Alex and I will have our wedding reception) as it was somewhere that Mum took us all when we were children. We went there last year, and I feel like it’s the right place to go and remember Kieran. I’m also glad that we’ve chosen this place for our reception. Whilst we had looked elsewhere, they weren’t available, and it seems right to have our wedding reception at a place where I have memories of Kieran (and where my family does as well). We don’t really have any other plans for today, but we’ll see what happens.
This week also meant remembering Kieran in a different way. On Wednesday, William Allitt (my secondary school) hosted their awards ceremony. Last year, we donated an award in memory of Kieran which is known as the ‘Kieran Knight Award for Kindness and Compassion’. We get invited to go to the ceremony, so this year Mum and I went. We like seeing who gets the award. Whilst this year is the first year that I didn’t really know any students (the current year 11s joined after I had left), it was still really lovely seeing people get awards and it was a trip down memory lane. Although, the ceremonies are certainly shorter. I used to have to sit through 2 hours of awards and speeches whereas this was around 45 minutes! I don’t know the girl who won the Kindness and Compassion award, but a friend from church does – apparently she is really lovely and often helps out at Guides.
So Kieran, you’re not forgotten, even during the busiest times of our lives when we have so much going on. You’re in our hearts every single second of every single day, and you’re greatly missed. Lots of love, from your ‘big’ sister xx